5 Thoughts That Cross a Groom’s Mind on the First Night!

A lot has been said and done about the first night aka, suhaag raat. Lame jokes, sly glances and high expectations always tag along on the first night. Last time I wrote about the bride’s thoughts so how could I leave the groom behind? Men might be simple creatures but they do have complex thoughts when it comes to the first night and sex! A number of things run through the groom’s mind but I have narrowed it down to 5 thoughts that they can’t escape from!  This is of course based on the assumption that this is the first time the bride and groom are having sex with each other!

1. Quality Time

Finally the couple is left alone, away from the annoying relatives and pestering kids. Of course the groom does a happy dance, quite similar to Lily’s Carlton dance. Now the groom can fart in peace (all that chole uff!) and be his absolute self!

2. Sleep or Play?

Men are always confused. They have an internal debate on whether they should sleep or succumb to their carnal needs. Most of the times carnal needs emerge as the winner!

3. Performance Anxiety

Performance anxiety or stage fear is quite common amongst men. They always doubt themselves when it comes to performing well in the bed. I think their biggest fear is if they will last long. They swear by the line “Nice men finish last” but can hardly keep up to it!

4. Biting

Although men love blow jobs, they are very skeptical of it. Why, you ask? Cause they fear that women will bite! Yikes! Spending the suhaag raat in an emergency room is not the ideal situation. They constantly pray that women don’t bite it while they’re down under!

5. Expectations

My girlfriends and the very kind girlfriends of the internet always complain about being unsatisfied. Apart from lasting long, the groom’s other fear is making his wife completely and utterly satisfied. Ladies, men always wish to live up to your expectations so give them a chance!

Grooms, am I wrong?