5 Things You Should Never Say to a Bride

The saying goes, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.”

People will post meaningful quotes and sayings on their Facebook walls but will seldom follow it. A wedding is a breeding ground for gossips. Mohalle ki aunties get a special chance to snigger and make snide comments about each and everything. They are also called “auntrypreneurs”-   their business is to be involved with everyone else’s business! Snide comments are not limited to aunties only- men too will pass snarky comments! So, people, let’s make a pact to not do this. Let’s not tear them down with your snarky remarks. In case you’re lost, here is a guide to help you. If you keep your mouth shut and not say these things to the bride, you’ll be safe!

1. Don’t Eat That

Uggh! Don’t say stuff like “don’t eat that, you’ll become fatter” or “lehenge mein fit nahi hona hai kya?” Science says that people who let women eat what they want have a longer life. Yaar, tum chamat khaoge kya?

2. Comments on Appearance

Once a woman announces her marriage, suddenly everyone around her becomes a “beauty expert” There is no need to bombard the woman with your vishesh tippani. Stop being fixated with the European idea of beauty! And if you ever suggest Fair n Lovely to anyone, please just please dafaa hojao!

3. If I Were You…

Offo, the “If I were Yous” are here. They start every sentence with “agar main teri jagah hoti toh…” and usually end it with “I would never marry so early” or “I would never wear THAT” blah and blah and blah and blah. Dekho boss, aap uski jagah nahi ho aur yeh hi uska saubhagya hai!

4. Fashion Police

I know I am a part of the fashion police squad but I would never go to a bride and pass comments like “isn’t that too revealing?” or “bhenji jaise kapde pehne hai” or “that colour doesn’t suit you” so on and so forth. If you don’t like what she is wearing, keep it to yourself or discuss with your friends. Why do you wish to bring the woman down?

5. Your Inconveniences

It is not okay to tell the bride the kind of “kasht” that you had to take for her wedding. The cost of your clothes, travel, makeup fee etc., is not to be discussed by the bride. You are just showing her that you are doing an ehsaan on her by attending her wedding. You made a choice to attend it!

People, please note – Jan iht mein jari!